Black Hair: Playing the white card? Gimme a break. It’s not that deep.

14 07 2009

The point is not to seperate the Black North-American community in two: Naturals VS Relaxed. And as a natural sister, my point is NOT to consider natural black hair as the only correct way to wear your hair. But there is a couple of arguments from the relaxed side (thought it is not really a side) that I just can’t stand.

b6We are in America.Right. And…?? I mean, seriously. Especially american women. You have been in that country for so long, you have helped builting it. You guys have been there for centuries. Stop acting like you were newly arrived people who have to adapt to ‘mainstream’ society. You ARE part of ‘mainstream society’. I mean, isn’t it what America is all about? Many cultures living together. I don’t know if it because it is always more difficult to see yourself from the inside. As a not-american women, I see America as a country that was moulded both by Europeans and African people. By having your hair relaxed or having a wig on and saying that you do it because ‘we’re in America’ is just ridiculous. The civil war didn’t happen for nothing. It think the African culture is as important in the history of America as the European culture. Why put one culture above the other as if it was something black women have to reach?

It’s about choice (wigs). I completely understand that arguement. I mean who doesn’t like to change style once in a while? But it is a wig. Why do so many wig girls have the same haircut 24/7? I hate the hypocrisy. Why saying it’s about choice when you have only one style? I mean wigs are wigs. It’s just hypocrite to say it’s about choice when you refuse to go out the house without a wig on your head.

It’s more professional/appropriate. I’ll do this short. Why should something natural be inapropriate? All you have to do is to learn how to style your natural hair. And it goes for all types of hair. Just like you don’t wear jeans on a wedding, you don’t just come to, I don’t know, a bussiness meeting with the same hair style that you would wear to go fishing with your dad on sunday afternoon.

It’s more manageable. Myth. Natural black hair is not more difficult to manage or style. You just have to know how to style it and take care of it. There are plenty (especially in America) of good products you can use, tons of ways you can style your hair that is trendy and not too over the top, and oh so many natural hair styles that require little day-to-day care while staying healthy and good-looking.

I find it ironic how there are so much less good products and salons for Black hair in Canada (due to a smaller Black community) but still, it seems like there are more natural people out here than in our US neighbours. I know society isn’t the same, demographics as well, and culture. I know African Americans and Black Canadians do not share the same history. But we’re all North Americans and thus, in a sense, very similar.


Let me end this post like this. For you sisters around the world who are not natural, please be true to yourself. If your hair is the way it is because of self-esteem issues (not to say that it is always the case), please just do something about it, work on loving yourself for who you are. And that doesn’t mean you have to go natural. That just means: be proud of who you are. Not the hair you wear. Instead, use your hair (and everything else about you, from your skin to your clothes) to tell the world that you love yourself.


Twins in Black and White + the DNA of Adam

19 08 2008

Germany, July 11, 2008. An interracial couple become new parents with two beautiful twins boys. One is White, the other is Black. Rare, but not impossible. The little boys’s names are Ryan and Leo. The mother is from Ghana and the father is from Postdam, Germany.  “None of us could believe it,” said the Lichtenberg maternity ward’s head doctor, Birgit Weber, adding that “both kids have definitely the same father.” Ryan, who came first, weighing 2.650 kgs, has light colored skin, blue eyes, and dark hair. His brother Leo, weighing 2.606 kgs, looks like his mother, with dark skin and dark eyes. Ryan has been described by his mother as ‘noisy,’ while Leo is a lot calmer.

The twins were delivered by Caesarean section in a Berlin hospital on July 11, but were kept from the public for six days. The probability of different colored twins being born even to a mixed-race couple is extremely rare. Doctors believe that the ‘genetic surprise’ might have occurred as one of the mother’s ancestors was white or one of the father’s ancestors was black.

Isn’t that amazing ? And so beautiful. This just proves how pueril and meaniless race really is. Not socially, but biologically. We create, as a society the racism. Racism is just so stupid. Did anyone see the Discovery Channel’s documentary on the DNA of Adam ? I’m really not into science and stuff, but the DNA is just so… infinite and amazing. I mean, one of my ancestor could have been white ! My parents are from Haiti where it’s really multi ethnic, partly because of the history of this country. The Spanish came, and the French and… anyway, I don’t believe in that pure race kind of speech that some people have. It’s just so ridiculous. There is nothing pure in DNA. DNA is links and links and links and links. I’m amazed. 🙂  I mean, this is how I like religion. I like it when it links with science. I’m not a believer. I need proofs and something reliable. This documentary is a must see !


Creole proverb

15 08 2008

Some days are just weird days. I’m trying to stay optimist, though. That may sounds corny, but I’m trying no to let bad thoughts overwhelming me. Negative things are such a waste of time (I believe I sound like a priest or something write this… ;))  But anyway. People often think I’m naive because of my always optimistic personality. It’s almost like an insult to them. Let me give you a little tip of mine when you have bad days, it’s creole proverb (with an arab origine, I think…):

Sé pa tout chyen ki japé pou ou viré dèyè gadé’l.

Wich means: It is not every dog that barks at you that you must pay attention to. Or, if you know a little bit of french (I believe it sounds better in french than in English): Le chien aboie, la caravane passe. Wich means: The dog’s barking, the caravan is passing. Let people say what they want, do what they want, it must not affect you.

* Graciousness of my mom who used to tell me that a lot as a kid and a teen going through rough periods… 🙂  Don’t we love our moms ? 😀

Black Hair – My hair journey

10 08 2008

For too many little black girls, it was a childhood ritual, like pouring make-believe tea. I would take a pajama top, drape it over my head, and with its sleeves trailing down my back, pretend that the cotton nightshirt was, instead, a flowing mane of hair, like the Breckgirl’s, or maybe Jaclyn Smith’s on “Charlie’s Angels” — neither of whom looked a thing like me. Now mind you, I was no self-hater. I grew up with (read more)

What’s the big deal with black woman’s hair ? Everything. I put on the pyjama top as a child, pretending to look like Britney spears, Christina Aguilera, Michelle from Destiny’s child or Jennifer Lopez. Like many others. I permed my hair from 11 to 15 years-old. My mama had asked me if I wanted to, I thought: “Thank God, finally !“ To me, long and straight hair was synonym of beauty. The Stars had them and the stars decided everything fashion and beauty. Destiny’s child, Halle Berry, Spice Girls, Britney, Jennifer Lopez, Alicia Keys… I believe that to my mother, permed hair meant a transition between girlhood and womanhood. I was 11 years-old, I wanted to please and attract people and to me, permed hair was the only solution. Long and straight hair was like a permission to flirt because only woman had long and straight hair. At 11 years-old, I felt like a woman already. Now that I think about it, I think that’s really funny and silly. It’s innocent… And destructive.

Perm hair is the demon. No jokes. At least, it was for me. I grew up, went in High school. At an age where teenagers discover themselves, I was wondering why wasn’t it okay to have kinky and curly hair ?…. Why wasn’t okay to just be myself ? Naturally. When I asked my mom about the hair and when I told her that maybe I could perhaps, possibly go back to natural hair, she laughed and said: “Curly hair is for little girls.“ Months have gone by, and basically, my hair could not handle the permed. I wasn’t taking care of them anyway. I didn’t want to. I learned to hate them. They were not me. They were not mine and they did not represent who I was. I felt like society and even the Black community around me was sending me this negative message: “Be someone else. Being yourself is not good enough.“ As you all know, I was dealing with self-esteem problems and my hair did not help me. And plus, I always felt that permed hair was just so ridiculous on me. I am Black, why should I play White ? I did NOT agree. Black hair is as good as white hair.

And so, at 13-14: Total rebellion. Well, almost, lol. I began to wear braids because I had took off the perm and my hair was just so damaged. It was somewhat of a middle ground. My hair was artificially long, but it looked more natural then permed hair. I did not want to play a role anymore. I mean, why should natural hair be inappropriate at a certain age if it’s, well, let me think… NATURAL ! So for two- two and a half years, I went through this dread-transition period. At 15-16, I began to wear my beautiful natural hair. Proudly.

At first, I just attached them in a pony tail. No, going back to natural hair was not easy. People’s gazes and looks (especially from the Black community) kind of bothered me at first. It was as if they were telling me: “WTF ?!?“ I don”t know. They may as well as thought: “Oh, natural sister !“ or just “Nice“, you know ? Still. It was probably just not common to see natural hair especially at my age (as a teen). Gradually, I began to wear twists (like in the picture… No, it’s not me.). Many, many different twists. Gosh, I really had some really bad hair days ! 😉 But it was… necessary, I guess. I had to find the way my hair looked better on me. It’s like a long and difficult communication between me and my hair. I looooove my natural hair. 🙂

I mean, twists are twists are twists. You know ? But twists are just so unique depending on who wears them and who did them and your hair type and length and strength… Next, I would like to try even more different hair styles. Twists-out and fros are cool. 🙂 I may try to use a texturizer as well before doing my twists.

Before I start boring you about my hair (that you had never seen anyway ;)), let me just say that I really honestly wish that beauty would stop be this really plastic skinny girl with long blond hair and all. It’s 2008. Beauty is everywhere, in every face, in every hair, in every skin. L’oréal didn’t get that, obviously. They denied having lighten Beyoncé’s skin. Good joke. L’Oréal is like the most plastic-like and superficial compagny ever. Now, little girls put their pyjama tops on their head trying to look like Beyoncé because they think “Wow, I can lighten and become as beautiful as she is !“ The reality is different, though. Of course, Beyoncé is gorgeous. But she’s fake, like every single other star. She’s hidden under makeup, I’m telling you. Don’t put a pyjama top on your head. It’s silly.

I’m not saying that Permed hair or extension or whatever unatural isn’t beautiful. It is beautiful. What I’m unhappy about is that it just seems that straigh hair is seen as the only beauty. I’m not angry at every black woman with unatural hair. I don’t care what you do about your hair, it’s your choice. Just saying: It’s NOT an OBLIGATION !

You know that girl on Cold Case, Tracie Thoms ? Love love love love her hair! Absolutely beautiful.

Black lesbian in NYC get 11 years for self-defense

9 08 2008

On June 14, four African-American women—Venice Brown (19), Terrain Dandridge (20), Patreese Johnson (20) and Renata Hill (24)—received sentences ranging from three-and-a-half to 11 years in prison. None of them had previous criminal records. Two of them are parents of small children. Their crime? Defending themselves from a physical attack by a man who held them down and choked them, ripped hair from their scalps, spat on them, and threatened to sexually assault them—all because they are lesbians. The mere fact that any victim of a bigoted attack would be arrested, jailed and then convicted for self-defense is an outrage. But the length of prison time given further demonstrates the highly political nature of this case and just how racist, misogynistic, anti-gay, anti-youth and anti-worker the so-called U.S. justice system truly is. The description of the events, reported below, is based on (read more).

And now, let’s ask ourselves : Why? -_-‘

The Black Stereotypes

6 08 2008

I know everybody can be the target of stereotypes. Each group have stereotypes related to them. But have you ever notice how the Black stereotypes makes us so strong and perfect ? And at the same time, imperfect ? We are athletic, criminal and poor. We have rhythm, we are loud, us girls know how to shake our butts, we are all obsess with our hair… You know what I mean by perfect and imperfect ? It seems like we never have serious mental and physical disabilities, we are never homosexual, we never hardly have any problems we’re never blind or deaf or mute… I mean, who really sees a black man or woman when they hear about the LGBT community ? I understand that society’s goal is to (indirectly) push heterosexuality, however, homosexuality is only understood as good because homosexuality is constructed as bad.

Stereotypes always hurt. Even the “positives“ one. I don’t know how to dance. I hate it when people tell me: “You’re Black, of course you have rhythm ! “ Now, not only the stereotype hurts. If you don’t fit within these limited categories and stereotypes, you are not Black enough to count. And at the same time, you are Black enough to be discriminated against.